| When I am showing my work a common questions is "what made you want to start painting?" or "How long have you been painting?" These come with lots of other questions like, "what inspires you?" and "who taught you?". I usually give some standard answer like..."Well I am a hairdresser so, I have always been creative." Then I will mention my first formal art teacher and I will finish it up with what inspired the collection they are currently looking at.
When I asked myself those questions a few years ago, the answers where much more complicated and revealed who actually taught me how to love. When I made this self discovery, I immediately called the people that I could get in touch with and verbalized what a difference they had made in my life and journey. Some where close to me but, most of those people were not in my close circle. That is where the lesson for me came in. It was a lesson in obedience to God's call in our daily lives. I painted all of them a painting made from the same broken mirror to be a reminder that when they feel “broken” to remember that they helped put someone back together. I shared with them a story that I had not thought of in years. The memory and images of it flooded into my head so vividly I felt as if someone had put a warm blanket around my freezing body. If someone wanted to pay me million dollars to say what inspired me to be an artist and they already new the answer, I would have missed it by a mile!
I was in the sixth grade and my teacher was Jane Embry. I lived in a very small town so, there was one teacher per grade. Most of the female teachers, at that time, were older. Miss Embry was young and kind of a bohemian. She had this very long beautiful thick hair. She wore it in a french braid and I thought it was the coolest thing I had ever seen (I think I just discovered my obsession with long hair writing this!). She taught us about Native Americans. To this day, Native American jewelry is still my favorite. Needless to say...I was her disciple.
My life at home was very tumultuous and unhappy so, school was my escape. It was Christmas and my family was moving away for what seemed like the 100th time. There was the usual "mean girl" drama at school and I fell victim to it. To someone else, that might not have been as
traumatic but, for me...It was paralyzing. I came to school and on my desk (and mine alone) was a wreath made out of construction paper that said "To the little girl that makes me laugh". I can vividly recall the glitter, the cutouts and the care that went into making it. It was the first time EVER that I felt special and that I had value to someone. To have value to someone that I was in worship of....what a lightning bolt! We moved that next week and I did not see Miss Embry again. She married a few years later and I cut out her wedding announcement and held onto it and the wreath for years. I saw her briefly years later but, never told her what she did for me.
The next several years after sixth grade remained tough but, I was armed with a new tool in my toolbox. The knowledge that I was special and important. In thirty years I have collected many addresses, a few ex- husbands and disappointments but, I have collected so many more wreaths.
Miss Embry showed me that taking the time to make something can make someones day and even save someones life. That when God shows you a neighbor that is hurting, it IS your responsibility to help. He showed YOU because he already gave you the gift to heal the hurt. I wish I still had that wreath. It would now be my most prized possession. I am sure it would be in some shadow box hanging in my studio reminding me of what my truth is. It would remind me, that when I get caught up in the dynamics of what it means to be an "artist" for a living...to listen to that voice that says, "do what you love and the money will come". As cliche as that is, it has worked for me all of my career. It would remind me to get my head out of my own tail and make sure I am being of service. Stop laboring over the mistakes of your past and learn, forgive and CHUCK IT! Thank you to all things Holy that God is not done with me yet and continues to show me that I am worth the overtime.
This recession did make me lose track. I changed what (and reason) I painted to increase sales. It had the opposite affect and my sweet boyfriend reminded me that I was better than that. If he had made me a wreath it would have said “Be true to yourself”...I went back to my truth and had my biggest show ever and continue to have great sales every week. So, my answer to the question “What inspires you?” is.....”Bringing Joy to someone”
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 | Wow........made me weep inside....so true, so well said, from the friend who has never left my side no matter how many stupid mistakes I made. You ARE special. You always have been. God blessed me with you in my life. You are an artist. You are an example of loving without wanting anything in return. I am proud to call you my "roomie".....my friend.....Love you.... | -- Anita, 6/28/10
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